Bone Marrow Brothers: Life Post Transplant

A million thoughts run through my head as I sit down and write for the first time in months. I don’t even know where to start to update you on life lately. I guess I should start with the bone marrow transplant for my brother-in-law since that’s where I left you guys hanging last.

I really meant to update y’all a while ago, but you know how it is, life gets crazy. Not to mention, after blogging for years, it was nice to disappear for a while. Sometimes sharing every aspect of your life on the internet is exhausting. Not that I don’t love sharing it with you all, but sometimes it’s just really nice to live life and not have to document every little thing for the blog. I guess life post transplant kind of shifted my blogging perspective, but I’ll get into that a little later.

The transplant didn’t go as smoothly as we had planned. All of the worst-case scenarios came true and what we had anticipated being a fairly simple procedure suddenly boasted a grim reality. We knew going into the transplant that there would be a chance that obtaining the bone marrow through the veins may not work out. There was a 10% chance of that during our vein assessment appointment, but transplant day that 10% chance suddenly became our reality. Since all of my husband’s veins blew just trying to get the IV’s set, getting his bone marrow from the vein was no longer an option and the next step was a vascular catheter. A procedure that sounded pretty simple, but carried a lot of risks.

After the first attempt failed, it was a little nerve-wracking to say yes to the second attempt. Aside from my husband’s life now being at risk, we still had his brother’s life to fear for as he had been administered a fatal dose of chemo, so if we didn’t go through with this procedure, that would be the end for him. We knew all of this going in, but when a family member’s life is on the line, being able to give them a second chance is a no-brainer despite the risk it has on your own life. The Vascular Catheter is a tiny little procedure doctors do all the time. In fact, if I had a dime for how many times I heard, “it’s so easy, it’s a 5 minute procedure!” just on our way to the cardiovascular floor, I would’ve left that hospital a rich lady. They basically put a port with two access lines into your jugular. Could you bleed out? Sure. Is getting an infection possible? Yes. Could that be dangerous? Absolutely. Not to mention, upon removal of this catheter, if they don’t do it quick enough and air enters the jugular, you’re done. Pretty harsh risks for a “5 minute procedure” if you ask me. I remember nodding aimlessly while trying to prevent my chicken biscuit from trying to regurgitate itself as the doctor asked us if we understood the risks. My husband consented to the procedure without hesitation and they shuffled me to the waiting room, where again, I was assured it would only be for 5 minutes. My only solace was the fact that they do these procedures all the time.

It was literally the longest 5 minutes of my life and that might’ve been because 5 minutes turned into 45 minutes and the screen in the waiting room said my husband was still “in procedure.” My anxiety started getting to best of me when I finally heard a nurse asking for Mrs. Brown. My name never sounded so sweet, well, maybe on my wedding day, but this ran a close second. After what felt like a maze of hallways, I turned the corner and saw my husband sitting in recovery sipping a coke from a straw and I gasped the biggest sigh of relief. Thank God he was okay. They had issues getting the catheter in, and his skin was so taut that it made the procedure extremely difficult. He looked a little battered, and honestly, after blowing all his veins and a hellacious “5 minute procedure” who wouldn’t? The rest of the transplant went accordingly. For the next 8 hours he laid in bed as a machine took blood from one line, separated his marrow, and flushed the blood back into the other line. We left the hospital exhausted but with the good news that they collected their goal amount of marrow, and the next day my Brother-in-law would start the process of receiving it.

Life post transplant was a big come down. We had spent the better part of 2018 stressing and preparing for that moment. It was a hard year, but it was such a learning year. It was a year that forever changed us and allowed us to grow spiritually, individually, and even better, grew us closer as a family. Being faced with the possibility of losing your partner is not something I’d ever think I’d experience at the ripe age of 34. But there I was, and it was a very sobering thought. It makes you appreciate the annoying things like the way he loads the dishwasher or the way he acts like he’s dying when he has a cold. Post transplant we just really tried to enjoy quality time as a family. I guess that’s where my blog priority shifted and why I disappeared for so long. We were so caught up in preparing and going through the transplant that the stress had gotten to all of us, kids included. I will never forget my daughter’s teacher asking me if everything was okay because Mykenzi had been off. If you know my daughter, you know that she is a spunky little ball of sass, and the word “off” doesn’t fit her demeanor at all. It took me all I could do to not start crying in front of her teacher, but thankfully, I at least made it out of the parking lot before I burst into tears. I thought we had done so well putting on a front that everything was okay for the kids, but as soon as her teacher asked if things were okay, it became abundantly clear we had failed. It broke my heart to know that our stress had become my daughter’s stress that started bleeding into her school life. This process was such a wake up call. People say it all the time, but time really is so precious, and life is short. Suddenly, the mundane routines became not so mundane and being present in the moment became even more of a priority. The way we parent shifted and the way we nurtured our other relationships changed too. We were living, and maybe more than ever, appreciating the fact that we were blessed to do so.

We slid into the holiday season incredibly grateful and focused on the blessings we had been given. Sometimes with great risks come great rewards, and thankfully for us, all the risks we faced transplant day were rewarded with the best news ever. My brother-in-law’s body accepted 100% of my husband’s marrow and we are fortunate enough to say he is now cancer free. News we welcome with open arms! This has been such a crazy time for our family, most crazy for my brother-in-law who had to live that hell, but we are so incredibly grateful for God’s mercy. We are looking forward to celebrating a happy and healthy 2019!

*WARNING!* Before you go any further, I just want to mention that the pictures below do show some blood bags and things of that nature, so if you’re squeamish, you probably don’t want to look.